I LOVE FASHION BUT FASHION DOESN'T LOVE ME

“I wear a size 30/32 and I can honestly say I have been denied fashion in its entirety. I love fashion I really do but I like it in the same that I love math and science, as a concept so over my head that I praise it as some kind of mystical sky god. I wear roughly the same thing every day (tent t-shirt/jeans) even though I have other, nicer clothing. I bought said pieces then got home and realised in my horror that I do not understand how to dress myself, and when I consulted a magazine, book, French stylist I met at a penningtons store event I got the same answer. Nothing tight, nothing bright, show very little skin, and here have a poncho. My biggest problem with fashion in relation to fat people is that it seems as if they are desperately trying to hide us even if it means ignoring us entirely.

Upon coming to this realisation I decided to rebel! To find the pieces I wanted and to revolt against the fashion norm of dowdy, billowy wrap dresses and tarp-like floral print tunics. Fuck flattering, VIVA LA FAT REVOLUTION!  However I found out how hard it really is to actually do that.

I mentioned before that I have been denied fashion as a whole that is true because of the following factors:

·         I have 68inch hips there is only one store in Canada that can sell me pants, also means no leggings or tights.

·         I have 3-4 different sizes in one torso (2x-5x)

·         I cannot physically wear heels and require motion controlled shoes and orthotics (no flats no sandles)

·         I wear corrective lenses (no funky pattern fames and no off the rack sunglasses)

·         That one time I was too fat for socks…

The clothing I actually do get that fits my hips does not fit my shoulder so I tend to rock the oh so adorable “kid in her mom’s clothing” look. All of that aside I am still trying, I am growing a small arsenal of kick ass orthotic-friendly sneakers, a collection of snazzy prescription eyewear  and have recently found out satchels are my best friends. I am pushing the envelope of what I allow myself to wear.  I now allow myself to wear things I consider sexy.  I am learning to sew and draft my own patterns and I have also purchased a knitting machine. Fashion better watch it’s back because I’m coming for it.”

“The thing that I hate the most about the fat fashion industry (besides limited selection, shitty quality…) is the fact that they treat all fat women as if they were exactly the same shape! For example, a normal store that sells jeans would have those jeans available in a variety of sizes and  A VARIETY OF INSEAMS. Because people’s legs aren’t all the same length! Fat women get to choose between whatever a regular length happens to be in the fat store, and PETITE. What happens if your legs are longer than the standard? Flood pants. What happens if you fall between the standard and petite? You’re stepping on your pants. As well, not all fat women have big bellies that need accommodating with very high rises. I have a flat stomach, and my hips are 20” bigger than my waist measurement—I am an extreme pear-shaped person. Most pants come up to my frigging rib cage! And are too short in the ass. And gappy in back because my waist size is not anywhere near my hip size. My second least favourite thing about the fat fashion industry is the lack of bright colours, especially in pants. My ass is not getting any smaller, so I might as well paint it red! I want weird plaid jeans. I want red jeans! I want jeans that fit me, even just a little bit! I am not hiding how big my body is with black clothes, I want to celebrate it with my favourite colours. My arms are strong, I’m not hiding them under longs sleeves. My boobs are awesome, I’m wearing something low cut. My waist is small, I’m wearing something tight. My ass is big! I will paint it red!”

“I hate the low burn of humiliation and hopelessness I feel any time I enter a clothing store that isn’t specifically for fat people. Knowing that I’ll be lucky if they carry XL or larger. Double lucky if those sizes actually mean something that would fit me. Infinitely lucky if they have those things and they aren’t all sold already. And if I do find something, I know it won’t fit comfortably on every part of me. If they’ve sized a shirt that fits my stomach, the buttons over my chest will gape open. If it fits my chest, the sleeves will be circulation-stopping tight on my arms. I hate that boots won’t fit around my calves, and that coats pull too tight across my back. Everything I wear whispers rejection to me, the pinches and pulling and restriction all saying, “This is not for you.”“

“I’m far from your average teenage girl and even farther from an hourglass figure. I have trouble finding stylish clothes that fit. Always. Most stores in my are carry nothing higher than an XL in blouses that are cut for women with an hourglass figure. For me, that translates to button-down blouses that will button all the way up, but not without a lot of tugging on the buttons at my chest. The gaps are ridiculous and even difficult to hide under a necktie or sweater vest. That also means that I will stretch out the hem of the shirt to properly tuck it in to my trousers, over my tummy. I wear a 7 ½ wide shoe. That’s practically impossible to find, especially in boots. I’ll find a pair that I love but the size 8 is awkwardly large, but still a bit too narrow for my feet and too tight on my calves. Women’s vests are cut to accentuate the chest, but my proportions are distorted by the cut because my chest is relatively small for my frame. I have to wear a man’s XL vest to fit my chest and tummy, but the excess fabric along my shoulders and under my arms leaves me feeling less than dapper. The chances of me finding sweet goth rings that will fit my chubby fingers are slim to none. I don’t have a lot of opportunities to shop online and the local selection at yard sales and charity shops like Goodwill aren’t so great. The point I’m making is, the selection of clothing for fat folks, especially those with figures that are less than “shapely” is terrible, even worse for those who are a bit more eccentric with their style. I don’t want to leave the house hiding my body in a pastel muumuu. I want to show off my confidence while looking like a nineteenth century gentleman, that’s all!”

“There is absolutely nothing worse than going into any cute, fashionable store with friends only to be reduced to purse duty because it’s an unsaid fact that nothing in that store will fit you. While everyone else is rummaging through racks, the best you can do is offer some advice and compliment their choices while staring at size tags that might as well be screaming at you “THIS ENTIRE SHIRT COULD FIT AROUND YOUR LEG”. Then at the end of the shopping spree, your friends have a new wardrobe and you have a new scarf, because that’s all you were able to find that fit. It’s not that there ISN’T clothes for fat people out there, it’s just that is all either ungodly hideous and tacky or The Single Most Boring Piece of Fabric You Will Ever Wear. Personally, I’m someone who loves color and patterns. And this is something sorely lacking in plus size fashion. Half of it is in dull, solid colors that make it seem like you’re supposed to be some big real life stage prop and blend into the scenery. The other half is animal print, which, if you ask me, makes me feel like I’m not even allowed to be an unfashionable PERSON, I’m an unfashionable animal. With black lace ruffles. And sequins. I don’t want to look like an uncoordinated bedazzled tiger, I want to look like how I feel, a woman who loves colors and designs and is pretty no matter what size the tag says.”

“What I despise the most about the fashion industry is the incessant amount of shame. The shame I feel when I’m going shopping with my friends when I’m stuck loitering around - or outside - the store as they get new clothing. The shame of looking at a fantastic shirt  that I know I could wear, comfortably and proudly, only to see it go up to a size 12. The shame I’m ‘supposed’ to feel, as a fat woman in today’s society, when I can’t shop at places like The Gap or Old Navy, and instead have to go to “fat people’s stores” like Fashion Bug and Lane Bryant. The shame of wanting to dress in a manner that I want to dress - eclectic, and stylish in my own way, on my own terms - and being forced to wear baggy, frumpy clothing because it’s what I’m ‘supposed’ to wear, ‘supposed’ to like. The shame of daring to be a fat woman who wants to be attractive and sensual. It’s the constant shame, the constant, silent ridicule, that I absolutely cannot abide. And I won’t.”

“I don’t wear much in the way of clothes, just jeans and t-shirts; shirts that I buy online in a size I know that fits me.  I used to hate clothes shopping as a kid because it took hours and I never had that kind of patience.  Now I hate it because every time I go into a dressing room and have to look at myself in those ridiculous mirrors with those stupid, unflattering fluorescent lights, I burst into tears and leave clothesless and depressed.  It’s hard being a fat girl in a world where size 0s are the desirables; where nothing fits right or looks good.  I love polka dots, stripes, and sunny colours, but they’re unflattering to larger figures.  We’re supposed to wear dark colours because they’re “thinning” and flattering on the figure.  We’re supposed to wear loose, flowing clothes because it “hides our weight.”

Screw that.  I want to wear those bright colours and polka dots and dress in the kinds of clothes I like but have never fit me.  I want to wear a button up t-shirt that I can button over my chest without it being too baggy over my stomach.  I want to wear shorts again, something I’ve been too afraid to wear since I was thirteen years old.  And mostly, when I go swing dancing, I want to be able to wear the dresses I like and feel good, not shamed because of the size of my body.  Fashion is about expression, and I want to express myself too!”

“i have been considered ‘plus size’ all of my life. i have had to shop in the womens department of old navy even before i got my period.  Until i realized that you dont have to wear what everybody else does and only shop at the teeny bopper stores, i was confined to only a select few stores that could ‘accomodate’ my hard to clothe body.  Just recently there was a Forever 21 store that opened in my nearby mall.  They have a SMALL section of the plus size line of clothing. I love it! EXCEPT for the terrible prints, the select sizes in the already small selection of clothes and the ridiculous pieces of clothing that they expect me to buy and wear as everyday clothing, or ‘a fun night out’.  For amount of night out clothes to everyday wear, the ratio is unrealistic.  I love sparkles and sequins as much as the next plus size diva, but, i don’t need 6 different colours in a tank top covered in sequins.  I don’t see what’s so hard that the company cannot just mass produce the same clothes as the rest of the store in bigger sizes! i’m shopping in the plus size section because i can’t fit in the ‘regular’ sizes. im not shopping there because i dont like the other clothes! Out of a mall of over 100 stores, about 3 stores could have my size, if im lucky. But people are thinking thats ok because we have the plus size stores, Addition Elle, Laura Plus, no. Those stores are NOT for teenagers.  Im not even going to begin with how people suggest those stores to me. i am 16 not 46. I like a nice crop top as much as the next person. (Not on myself because society would shame me and say i look disgusting) I hope any of these ranting help at least one person realize that its not just 20 girls complaining its thousands, trying to fit in with their friends and into their clothes.”

“The fashion industry never fails to offer reason for extreme loathing by all girls.

““Starving art student,” well not exactly. “Poor as dirt” may be more accurate. Art students are known for many things, but their fashion sense and their poverty are among the most stereotyped. I myself will admit that I fit nicely into the mold of poor and fashionable. However, when I do scrape enough money together to get some new cloths, my search for unique and fashion forward apparel is fraught with hardship and woe.